so i'm sitting right now in a hotel room in west des moines iowa, on a little mini vacation. basically it came about like this:
josh: hey beckah, whatcha doing saturday?
me: meh, nothin' really, why?
josh: i kinda want to do something, i have some time off work
me: what're you thinking?
josh: iowa for ribs?
me: omigod, that's exactly what i was thinking!
& while i'd only been kinda half thinking of iowa for ribs, the idea kinda grew on me. & with next week being a half week at work & all, i thought "eh, what the hell, a small trip out of town will be ok. & hopefully i'll be able to give myself some writing time while i'm at it."
so far no real writing has been done, but i've painted my fingernails a lovely shade of lime green. we had dinner at bennigan's & i had a bowl of soup & split a desert with jack. so far no regular pop, no alcohol, no snacks, no real breaking of the rules. & it's hard 'cause i do have this mentality that when i go on vacation it's a total fuckin' free for all.
exhibit a: the april trip to san francisco for my tattoo. we went to the stinking rose & indulged in yummy garlicky good food. we had in & out burger double-doubles three times, two each time with fries, of course, & then the snacks & the alcohol & chocolate & ice cream. & i basically took a nice little break from reality. & with the GP looming on the horizon i need to change a lot more than just what & when i eat. i need to revolutionize my relationship with food & how i think of my socializing time.
i really don't know if it's just an american thing, or a minnesotan thing, or if it really is universal, but in my world socializing is very often synonymous with food. & good food. & lots of it. most often when i'm with my friends & family when i'm eating it's not even necessarily because i'm really hungry, but a lot of it is all about opportunity. just like our dear friend kevin costner was told "if you build it, they will come," if the food is there i'll eat it. yeah, i know, totally a fat girl thing to do, but it's more of a human thing. i've noticed that a lot of not fat people will munch on food that's in front of them even if they're not hungry.
it also helps my resolve that i spent a great deal of time this morning at the Y, almost an hour & a half of serious exercise. that really does make me less likely, typically, to sabotage myself with food. then again, tomorrow i'm going to be at hickory park with my face in a plate full of ribs, but not like i do that every day. there is a gym here at the hotel, & even though it's about quarter after 2 am, i'm seriously contemplating a wee bit of sweat time before we check out. or i may start working on those 50,000 words before i turn in for the night. or i may just turn off my lappy & cuddle up with my pink fuzzy hello kitty pillow.