Tuesday, August 14, 2007

auntie em, auntie em, it's a twister, it's a twister, oh wait, no it's not

so i'm a wee bit north of tornado alley, that's typically the area of the united states also known as the bible belt (short aside: is it a coincidence that the area of the country known for bible-thumping-tent-revival-fire&brimstone-jeZUS-died-for-your-sins is also plagued by the majority of tornadoes? hrm, that's a noggin scratcher. . .not that i have anything against bible thumpers, i'm related to a few) so, even though we're a bit north from that infamous area of the country, we've been getting hit by some major storms over the past few days. this past satruday morning, in the early wee hours, or late friday night depending on your perspective, we got hit pretty hard. there were large tree branches, & in some cases, entire trees, downed by the storm. quite a few people lost power for a few hours, & some people even lost their power for a few days, actually, i think a select few are still without power from the saturday storm.
well, mother nature decided that we needed a little more of the wet stuff here in the twin cities. last night during the eight o'clock hour the meteorologist kept cutting in on hell's kitchen to give updates of the impending storms descending, quite literally, on the twin cities. normally i am a really huge fan of storms, i love curling up in a comfy chair or on the couch with a fuzzy squishy blanket & a book & just let the rain beat a beautiful rhythm on the roof while i lose myself in the wonderful world of fiction. but last night was the season finale of hell's kitchen.
as of late i have been trying very hard to distance myself from tv, watch less tv, read more, that whole schtick. i really believe that tv is making me dumber. this realization came after the fact that i was watching the simple life & actually enjoying it. yes, i was watching it willingly, i was not in anyway tied to my chair & there was not a gun pointed at my head. now, i had not yet gotten to the point where i was willingly hunting down the simple life, but while i was at the group home, my second job, i was watching it because another staff person turned it on for the residents (they like comedies). so after i woke myself out of the reality tv induced mental coma, i decided tv was sucking my life away & i have too much i want to accomplish to just sit & let my life & soul be sucked out of me by the boob tube. i actually don't even have a tv in my room at my apartment, my roommate has one in the living room, but i left my tv snugly at my parents' house.
one of the few exceptions to my personal ban on the one eyed monster, is chef ramsay night. my mom & i will get together on monday nights, watch hell's kitchen, have a spot of supper, & converse during commercials & laugh as chef ramsay tells chef after chef to "fuck off" or quit trying to serve up "baby shit." now she & my dad are on their two week anniversary get away up north in da-lut, so i had to go it alone for chef ramsay night last night, which was fine, i was recording it for her, & i plan on taunting her by saying "neener neener neener, i know who wo-on." the one wrench in my was mother nature & her sudden appearance of storm *angrily shaking my fist skyward*
just before nine pm, about quarter til-ish, the storm was really kicking up, the station rearranged some commercials & kept breaking in, they were kind enough to at least give us some of the show, & they did let us see the moment when rock & bonnie turned the handles of their doors, rock's opened, bonnie's didn't, so he was the winner, and then- back to the weather. to which i had my own little profanity break. ok, now granted, there were three storms converging, all with "tornado ripe situations" & they were bearing down on blaine & coon rapids, both of which have some fairly large trailer parks, but seriously, if there's a tornado knocking on your door & you live in a trailer & you're STILL sitting watching tv, well, you have bigger problems.
i'm not necessarily saying that fox 9 should have ignored the whole situation, but would it have really killed them to give us the last couple minutes of hell's kitchen? just another two minutes so we could see rock get all teary eyed (i'm guessing) & see bonnie's graceful admission that rock is the better chef (once again, just guessing). who knows, maybe there was a major knock down drag out between the two finalists. maybe bonnie found out that julia, while on her team, was rooting for rock & POSSIBLY not doing her best job for the blond nanny? seriously, anyone who's come up with a pink plus sign on a pregnancy test when they were hoping for a minus knows that A LOT can happen in a minute, or less even. true story.
so alas & aleck, i know that rock won, but not the nitty-gritties. as far as i know we didn't actually get any tornadoes in the cities here. we got some pretty fierce winds, some more power outages, quite a bit of rain, & one hell of an ass kicking my mother nature, but luckily she saved the big guns for another day. but i am still very disgruntled regarding the season finale of hell's kitchen. i publicly petition fox 9 to rebroadcast the season finale for all of us who really wanted to see the entire show. i feel gypped. once again, i feel like everything was building to this wonderful climax & it was rudely yanked away. like someone falling asleep a minute too early. true story, a lot can happen in sixty seconds.

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